Let’s welcome 2023 with a clear picture of how we DO want to show up and who we want to be! As a life coach, many people come to me with a lot of clarity on what they DO NOT want in their life and therefore place a lot of time and energy on this outcome they say they don’t want. With a word of the year, you get a chance to really prime yourself to focus on what you DO want…and therefore see more of what you do want in your life.
How to find your word of the year & root down with intention in 2023
In episode 107 of Self Love & Sweat THE PODCAST, you’re going to learn the best & most effective way to set your New Year’s goals & intentions. Lunden walks you step by step through how to choose and set your Word of the Year for 2023 and why it’s so much more effective than a New Year’s Resolution.
Many people fail with their New Year’s resolutions because they had completely unrealistic goals, didn’t even bother to keep track of their progress, completely forgot about what their resolution was AND made way too many resolutions they couldn’t possibly meet them all. Not this year. Tune in & learn how to set your word of the year:
Timestamps to help you navigate this episode:
(3:20) My “chill” button is a little bit rusty
(5:49) Did you set a word for 2022 (last year)?
(7:35) How to find your word of the year for 2023
(9:55) Steve Harvey video on gratitude
(12:29) Sponsor: Snap Supplements 25% OFF using code LUNDEN25
(16:10) Journaling & writing
(22:27) Being there for you
(23:40) Core values
(28:38) Your new year begins when you say it does
FULL EPISODE 107 TRANSCRIPT
Lunden Souza: [00:00:00] Welcome to Self Love and Sweat the podcast, the place where you’ll get inspired to live your life unapologetically, embrace your perfect imperfections, break down barriers, and do what sets your soul on fire. I’m your host Lunden Souza.
Lunden Souza: [00:00:20] Hey, have you grabbed your free self love and sweat monthly calendar yet? This calendar is so amazing. It comes right in your inbox every single month to help you have a little nugget of wisdom, a sweaty workout, a mindset activity, just a little something. Something to help keep you focused and motivated and keep that momentum towards your goals. So every day when you get this calendar, you’ll see a link that you can click that will lead to a podcast episode or a workout or something that will be very powerful and quick to read. And then you’ll also see on the top left corner of every single day there’s a little checkbox in the calendar. And what that is, is that’s for your one thing. You can choose one thing every month, or it can be the same something that you want to implement and make this something that you can easily implement, like daily meditation or getting a certain amount of steps or water, for example, and staying hydrated and even taking your supplements. This can be something, if you want to get more regular, doing a particular habit and routine, you can choose what that checkbox means. So if you want your self love and sweat free monthly calendar delivered right to your inbox every month on the first of the month, go to lifelikelunden.com/calendar. Fill out the form really quickly and you will have your calendar and your inbox within a few short minutes. That’s lifelikelunden.com/calendar Go get yours for free and enjoy this episode. Welcome back to Self Love and Sweat the podcast. Today we’re talking about setting your goals for next year, this coming up year at the time of recording this is 2023. So setting up your goals and this is not a New Year’s resolution. These are not smart goals. This is something a practice I do every single year and coach all my one on one clients to do this. I’ve made videos and content on this in the past and a friend of mine actually, Mike, he’s been on the podcast, a bunch former hockey player, now he’s a real estate agent now in Canada, and he made an Instagram story the other day and tagged me in it, talking about how he was getting ready for 2023 by doing his word of the year. And that was something that he and I had talked about before and had shared with one another. He’s one of those friends that were just like always in each other’s corner and very like growth mindset oriented. And yeah, he is always posting some great stuff on social media.
Lunden Souza: [00:03:09] And so he kind of was like, it was kind of like a tag year it moment when I initially thought about it, probably like end of November, he posted about it and I was like, Oh yeah, this is something I usually do towards the end of the year getting into early New Year. But I was really like, No, I want to spend about a month thinking about this and I want to really, Yeah, dig into other avenues of my life and of growth. And I want to choose wisely. Not that I wasn’t choosing wisely before. My words this year were relaxed and learn. I chose two words and actually this were this year I chose two words as well, but kind of as a combo word versus two separate words like I had in 2022 of this year. So I just yeah, relax and learn was my or my words of 2022. And that for me was a reminder to relax. Right? Like, chill. Maybe you’ve been following me for a while. Maybe you’ve listened to this podcast before, maybe you know me in real life, but the chill button is a button that is a little dusty and rusty on my end. I just am always wanting to go, go, go, Do, do, do. And that’s something I’ve just really been working on, tuning in to the messages that you get when you’re not doing much, when you’re relaxing, when you’re working in, when you’re doing more restorative practices.
Lunden Souza: [00:04:36] And so I found that you can get and I continue to kind of do this dance, let’s say, if you will, of, you know, go hard in the paint and then like, just like breathe hard in the paint, if that makes sense. Like this, work out and work in kind of dance. And I just and I think that what’s most important, at least in my life, is that we make it a dance and not tug of war. Right. So relax and learn my words for 2020 to relax, like I said, reminding me to chill and relax and learn, learn proactively in terms of like reading books, taking courses. I got my breathwork practitioner. Certification this year. So that for me was learning and then also being able to learn in the moment from a particular situation or maybe in retrospect from particular situations, because I feel like, yeah, oftentimes we find ourselves in distress over certain situations and I think when we can learn from them, that makes them mean something and make them contribute to our next better decisions. And so in that sense, that was relaxed and learned for me in 2022. So did you set a word for 2022? Did you do you do something like this? Is this a practice that you do? I just feel like this is so much better than New Year’s resolutions, because New Year’s resolutions are focusing on just one thing.
Lunden Souza: [00:06:02] Like, I want to reach this particular goal. And oftentimes it’s very ambiguous and I feel like focusing on one particular goal. Yeah, I get it right. You know, you’re more narrow, focused on one particular thing, and at the same time it’s like for a whole year, no wonder people stop or forget about it after two weeks or whatever. I feel like a word of the year allows us to bring that word of the year with us everywhere. It allows us to be like, okay, how would relax and learn? For example, show up, You know, today in the grocery store, in my romantic relationships and my friendships as a daughter, as a business owner, you know, it’s like you get to ask yourself and check in with that word of the year regularly and it gets to show up in different ways in your life regularly instead of just focusing on one particular New Year’s resolution that just becomes like, yeah, a thought of the past. You know, this word of the year can really be integrated into all areas of your life. And that’s the whole point, right? So word for 2023, what do you have anything come to mind? I think it’s nice sometimes just to write down a bunch of words, words that remind you of how you want to continue to show up and words that kind of push your limits a little bit and kind of get you to be a little bit uncomfortable and get out of your comfort zone or lean into an area that just might be a little bit sticky and uncomfortable.
Lunden Souza: [00:07:35] And so maybe there’s something that you’re leaning into. Maybe there’s a word that’s just been coming up for you. I think sometimes when we start to think about this and of course, feel free to think about this, but as we start to think about it, you know, different words might come to mind or you might see a sign that says something or someone might be like, Hey, you’re so, I don’t know, blank. And you’re like, Oh yeah, thanks for seeing that. And me and I see that in me too. And I want to bring more of that into my life. And yeah, you might hear like a word like in conversation or like I said, you might see it on a sign or be reading a book or just it might come to you on a walk or something like that. So maybe there’s something that comes directly to mind. And as you’re thinking about it, allow Yeah, kind of what the universe will do is kind of give you signs and signals and synchronicities and things to help you get to that word. And I find that always kind of a fun process where I’m like, okay, I know I’m going to pick a word. I know I’m going to make my word of the year, but I don’t really know exactly what it is yet, but I’m just going to think about how that might feel.
Lunden Souza: [00:08:41] I’m going to think about, yeah, ways and areas of my life that I’ve shown up as that. Or like I said, words where I’m like, Oh yeah, in those particular situations this year that were really challenging, I, if I could go back, would have shown up more as X, Y or Z. So now I want to bring that word into my word of the year. So then next time I can be reminded to show up that way, right? So it’s like a little nudge in the right direction and then like a little cheers for yourself for like doing the thing and showing up as a person that you want to be. And so for me, I actually have my journal out in front of me and I kind of I like to put pen to paper. I don’t know how you guys feel all brainstorm on notes like the notes on my phone, but overall, I just really like to put pen to paper. And so I know what my word of the year is, but I wanted to yeah, I wanted to open up to that page on my journal. So anyways, my word of 2023 this year is growth. Growth. And then I have like to I have growth written and then I have to like, yeah, lines coming off to the side. So kind of subdividing the word growth into two categories.
Lunden Souza: [00:09:55] I have that maturity and security. So growth and maturity and growth and security and actually my word is grateful growth. So I really wanted to bring gratitude into my word of the year. I really love Steve Harvey. He’s like my favorite famous person of all time. And he did a really great video. He does a bunch of really great videos on reels and stuff like that, but he did one on gratitude and like, I think it was something about like gratitude being a currency and just like, yeah, about how he even found himself among being one of the richest guys. He’s on TV seven days a week, like just not being grateful and just being like, super ungrateful. And he had to check himself and be like, No, I want to choose to be grateful daily. And so I watched that video a few months ago, and it’s one that I go back to regularly. I have it like saved on my Instagram and I go back and watch it regularly. So when I was making my word of the year, at first I was like, okay, maybe I’ll pick two gratitude and growth. But then at one point I was just thinking about it and writing and just like, yeah, just spending some time like with it energetically and thinking about it. And I was like, Hmm, maybe grateful growth because what I know about myself and maybe you’re the same way too, is that sometimes there’s growth, but then I’m like, Oh, well, that wasn’t enough.
Lunden Souza: [00:11:15] Or, you know, you should have done better, or I don’t take the time to even celebrate the growth. So for me, the reminder in 2023 is that growth and is that grateful growth? And then the two subcategories, like I said, are maturity and security. So grateful growth in maturity. And I wrote here, like in relationships emotionally, and I wrote hashtags. My friend Steph, who I love so much, I met her through working at Adidas Runtastic, and she’s a dear friend of mine, but her and I will often like, communicate with ourselves in hashtags so her and I will just throw throw out some funny hashtags when we’re working through something. And so I have here hashtag no red carpet. Hashtag. I’m the problem. Hashtag I’m the solution. Hashtag I’m surrounded by growth. So for me, the hashtag no red carpet. And then it kind of escalated with some of these other hashtags here. But it’s just like little quick and easy funny tools to remind me of. Like, oh, yeah, the maturity, the the grateful growth in that area of maturity is reminding myself that, like, no one’s going to roll out the red carpet for me. Nobody’s going to do the work. Nobody’s going to do the rest, right? Nobody’s going to do the work outs. No one’s going to do the work ends for me. Quite frankly, I don’t deserve anything.
Lunden Souza: [00:12:29] Right? If I’m not grateful for it, why should I be given more? Right? So that’s how I feel in that maturity section. Hey, really quick, I want to interrupt the podcast for just a minute to tell you about one of my favorite supplements for hair, skin, nails, digestive and gut health, and that is snap supplements, super greens with collagen. Now, if you’re following me on social media, you’ve probably seen me post about this a bunch because honestly, this product tastes amazing and it’s jam packed with nutrients, like I said, to support healthy hair, skin and nails. It helps support detoxification, a healthy immune system. And there’s even probiotics in there for a healthy gut. It’s non-GMO, no sugar added, soy free, grass fed collagen. And every scoop is going to give you a seven grams of protein. And this is why I love it, because it’s not like a protein shake. It’s just a scoop of powder. It tastes amazing. I put it in water, or if I want more hydration, I’ll put it in coconut water and mix it up. And it’s like having a nice, refreshing beverage that’s packed with a bunch of super greens and protein. So what I’m super excited about is that for listening to the podcast, you’ll get this discount here nowhere else, but for listening to the podcast. You can save 25% off on all your SNAP supplement purchases, including the super greens with collagen, and you do that by using Code LUNDEN25 at checkout. That’s LUNDEN25 for 25% off at checkout. You can shop on snap supplements or you can shop on my website lifelikelunden.com/supplements and you’ll see there there’s already an additional 10% taken off. But you because you’re a podcast listener, you’re going to get 25% off when you use the code. LUNDEN25 at checkout LUNDEN25 at checkout to get your snap supplements, super greens and collagen and all your snap supplements for 25% off. Now let’s get back to the show.
Lunden Souza: [00:13:54] That’s l u n d n 20 5lun DNA to five to get 25% off at checkout. You can shop on snap supplements dotcom or you can shop on my website life like London dotcom forward slash supplements. And you’ll see there there’s already an additional 10% taken off. But you because you’re a podcast listener, you’re going to get 25% off when you use the code. London 25 at checkout l u n d n 25 at checkout to get your snap supplements, super greens and collagen and all your snap supplements for 25% off. Now let’s get back to the show and then security is for me like kind of the opposite of being insecure, being more secure, and who I am as a. Woman as a life coach and just as a person in general. I think we all deal with insecurities at times. So this secure reminds me of that. And then also a grateful growth when it comes to financial security and increasing my income and being able to do more of what I love and make a bigger impact financially. And so those are the two areas that I want to focus on. And so it’s not simply, like I said, picking a word like abundant or grateful and like, Yeah, woo. It’s like, okay, and what does that mean and what is that going to look like in real life? And have you spent time thinking about, okay, what is this word like? I broke it up into two categories.
Lunden Souza: [00:15:20] I’ve been working on this with my one on one clients as well, and we’ll make like a web where it’s like, okay, this is the word or group of words that I want to bring into my life and into my world and into my impact this year. And then I’ll make it like a web. So then there’s little like, yeah, little lines with circles around. So you have this kind of like spider web ish kind of chart, kind of visual representation and then being like, okay, well, what does that really look like in your life? If you’re going to say graceful growth, for example, it might be like making sure that I’m proactively checking my bank account and saving and monitoring things month over month with Jessica, who’s my financial wellness coach, who I love, increasing the security in myself. Journaling has been so helpful. I can’t even tell you how much writing has been helpful for myself and for my clients. And it’s been such a beacon of self love just to release that on paper and to get out a lot of things that I didn’t realize I was holding on to. And so for me, growth in that secure of who I am kind of area definitely includes journaling, definitely includes regular regularly like release or cleaning out of the emotional filter, if you will, through journaling. I love that so much.
Lunden Souza: [00:16:43] It feels so good. And every morning I just wake up and do my meditation and I just start writing. Whether it’s a rewrite of a particular story that I’m working on that’s been troubling me. If it’s just like whatever might come to me or a journal prompt or just, yeah, a continuation of maybe something I was working on, like working on my word of the year and getting out some notes and just putting pen to paper. So that for me has been a very powerful self love tool that I could not have imagined. Could have been that for me, but it is. And so that would go on that on that web for me, no red carpet. It’s like reminding me to wake up and do the work. I think it was really challenging after going from working at Adidas Runtastic, having this amazing team doing a lot of stuff where, yeah, like the red carpet was rolled out for us in so many ways. We had so many awesome opportunities. And then when I came back to America, left a lot of what I was doing there, continuing my work in life, coaching and podcasting and all of that. There were moments where I was just found myself in like deep frustration because I was like, Oh, I want that team back. That team work. We were always just moving forward and yeah, working together and just like making great things happen. And it was just, yeah, a moment where I would just find myself frustrated because it deep inside I really missed that and I really missed that teamwork.
Lunden Souza: [00:18:13] And I still stay connected with a lot of my former coworkers and love them dearly and deeply. But that reminder of the no red carpet is like, hey, like. Yeah. And. You know, what are you going to do? Like mope over what teamwork you used to have before? Are you going to continue to build your leadership skills and grow your team? And that’s what I’m doing, right? But sometimes it’s frustrating and I find myself in moments of frustration just thinking like, Oh, I feel like and I know that I’m not. But I do have those moments where it’s like, I feel like I’m going backwards and I just have to be like, No one’s going to roll out the red carpet for you. London I’m the problem and I’m the solution. I have that under the maturity section of Grateful Growth as well. And that’s really just a reminder of like ownership, ownership and not allowing me to get in that trap of waiting for things outside of me to change or waiting for people to change or circumstances to change in order for me to have that growth. And so, yeah, ownership is huge in that web, if you will. So yeah, think deep about your word of the year. You know, make some subcategories, make that web like I talked about and include particular situations is like, you know your life, you know who you’re around, you know, you know who might trigger you or certain circumstances that might come up.
Lunden Souza: [00:19:34] And so write those down and and write them as if you are being that word of the year. You are embodying that word that you say that you want to be. And so that’s why I love using this tool, because it goes into all areas of your life, not just one particular weight loss goal or health related goal or financial only goal. It’s like, okay, yes. And when you have that particular New Year’s resolution for what? What is that bigger purpose? And maybe through that kind of thought process, you can find your word of the year, too. And then I wrote down some like I am statement, some affirmations that go along with how I feel when it comes to grateful growth. And those are I choose to feel good when it’s not all good. I’ve noticed, yeah. Situations in my life where I feel good when it’s all good and I am not as proud as how I act and react when it’s not all good. And so I choose to feel good. When it’s not all good, I feel supported and grounded. I know who I am and who I am not. I don’t expect anyone or anything to come through for me. I can be alone and feel full. I am a magnet for miracles and I gratefully accept what is meant for me.
Lunden Souza: [00:21:03] And yeah, I think when I read those affirmations and as you’re making your affirmations that represent more of how you want to show up with your word of the year, right? Things like I said, like I choose to feel good when it’s not all good. That is very uplifting and empowering for me, but also a reminder of where I’ve been and where I don’t want to be. Same thing with very supported and grounded right now. At the time of recording this podcast, I’ve been traveling a ton over the last year between like traveling for pleasure, traveling for work, traveling to support friends in their work, traveling to go see my boyfriend on the East Coast. And yeah, I feel supported and loved in that sense, but I don’t feel very like rooted and grounded at the moment. I’ve been describing myself as more of like a hover board or a ping pong ball. And so to say that affirmation, I feel very support and and grounded is definitely an affirmation that I’m on my way to embodying even more because right now I don’t feel that way that much. And there’s been a couple of things in the last few days where I’m like, okay, yeah, that’s really helping me feel more supported and grounded. And so, yeah, I know who I am and who I am not. I don’t expect anyone or anything to come through for me.
Lunden Souza: [00:22:27] So like I mentioned, these were areas that I’ve struggled of being like, Oh, you know, I wish I had that teamwork or I wish I had that momentum that we created. It just kind of felt like I said I was going backwards or starting from the beginning. But I mean, I totally was in all senses of the word, and there were many times I had to remind myself, like. In order for others to come through for me, eventually I need to be coming through for me. So in this process of feeling like starting over and essentially starting over, starting to come through with myself has to come first, and then other people as my team grows, it’s really awesome because you’re like, Yes, okay. The more that I focused on how I wanted to show up, the more of what I needed continued to show up in the form of people on my team that I love. So yeah, I can be alone and feel full. That one for me is not a stretch. I love to be alone. I often joke that like, I don’t know, I could go weeks, maybe months, without any human interaction. I don’t know if that sounds weird. Maybe it does. But for me, I can be alone and feel full. That’s like a very true statement for me, and that’s something I want to continue to remind myself of is like when I need to be recharged. Oftentimes being alone is really what works best for me.
Lunden Souza: [00:23:40] So that one kind of resonates a little bit deeper now. But yeah, so I guess one more thing I would want to share because I have it right next, like this next pages in my journal and to the point that I wrote for my I am statement, I said, I know who I am and who I am not. And so with that I have a list of eight core values and I won’t go into all of them or a ton of detail now on how to set these up for you. But what I will say is I think you can think about core values, right? Like how you want to show up in the world, the values that represent. Yeah. Who you are. Right. And I think sometimes we forget that or we realize we are following somebody else’s values or values that we learned when we were a kid and just like, thought they were like the way everything was. And we realize, hey, like, actually I can set up the rules to my game and I can say and declare who I want to be and what my core values are and what that looks like in my life. And so I do this always, of course, for myself and with my one on one clients, too, because it’s just a powerful tool to come back to, to remind you of who you are and who you are not, and maybe areas you want to continue to grow or areas you want to set boundaries.
Lunden Souza: [00:25:01] And so making a list of words that describe how you want to show up that also have examples. So I’ll give you some examples of mine. One of my core values is cellular courage. And cellular courage for me is intuition plus ancestors. So like those before me, right? Those in my family, my family line, plus surrender. So it’s like that internal knowing that ancestral backing and then that full surrender of like, I don’t know shit and I don’t know what’s going to happen. And I’m here for the ride. That for me is like courage at a cellular level. So that’s one of my core values. Consider it. I’m aware of the energy I bring into a space. I remember to regularly look up and pay attention, learn and see how I can help. Being considerate also really reminds me. Yeah. To like, look up and look up from my phone. Right? Oftentimes I’ll be walking and doing things and I’ll like, yeah, not notice a beautiful moment or not notice an opportunity to like, hold the door open for someone or that someone’s like, you know, trying to walk next to me and I’m like on my phone in la la land and I just feel like that word considerate reminds me of who I am and who I’m not and how I want to show up and just being aware of that.
Lunden Souza: [00:26:21] So yeah, core values I think are a powerful tool to get clear. Like I have the core values and then I’ve, I’ve spent time writing some bullet points underneath of like, okay, what does that look like in my life? How am I going to know when cellular courage is present? And I wrote there like, I am not afraid to do what it takes to run my business. I am not afraid to walk away from relationships and and yeah, so that’s a way that cellular courage shows up regularly. And maybe you listening are an entrepreneur or own your own business, or are in a position of leadership where sometimes there’s feelings of like, Oh, can I do this? Or how the hell am I going to do this? And so I channeling into that cellular courage is really helpful. So yeah, those core values are helpful in the sense of what I wrote before, where it says, I know who I am and I know who I who I am not. And I think we might all have a sense, right, of like what we might be on board with and what we might not be. But when we put it down to paper and we say, Hey, this is my word of the year, this is how I want to show up. And then here are my core values. So as I’m navigating and setting boundaries and just like doing life, I can be like, Hey, is this an alignment with my core values? And I feel like that’s helpful for me to make better, more sound decisions, and then also to be able to be like, Hey, let me get back to you.
Lunden Souza: [00:27:44] Let me think about it. And it’s not just like thinking about it. It’s literally like being like, okay, I’m consulting my core values. I’m looking at the rules and the ways that I say I want to show up. And I’m like, Is this a yay or nay? You know, this is all the way in? Or are we just, you know, not if this is not fitting and this is not working. And the cool thing about core values is when we put them down and declare them and make them there and like living and breathing, we can think about previous moments in our lives where it’s like, Oh yeah, no wonder that felt so incongruent because, yeah, it was totally not in alignment with these values. And now that I have them, like written on paper and like, brought them to life, it just makes so much sense as to why that was like a total mess or a total flop, or it just didn’t feel right in your gut or something like that. So yeah, 2023, let’s make it, you know, I think, Who was I talking to? I can’t even remember where they said like, I don’t really feel like it’s a new year in January.
Lunden Souza: [00:28:38] I feel like it’s a new year in. I don’t know if it was her birthday or it was like September or something. And she’s like, That’s what I really love about this time of year. It was I think it was September where she’s like, It doesn’t feel like a new year in January. It feels like a new year for her in September. And she was just like that for me is a very renewing, inspiring time. And so, yeah, it can be, you know, in the theme of this particular timing of the release of this podcast episode and, you know, whatever it can be that you’re listening to this when it’s released right at the end of 2022, you’re getting ready for 2023. But if you’re listening to this and it’s like later on, it’s like, who cares? It’s never too late. And maybe for you you’re like, Yeah, I don’t feel like the New Year starts on January 1st. I feel like it starts on, I don’t know, July 6th, then go for it. Right? So whenever you’re listening to this, it’s never too late to decide to choose to decide how to how you want to show up and what your core values are and what words describe how you want to be in all areas of your life. The way you do one thing is the way you do everything. And I think when you get to choose the way you want to do that one thing and and show up, you know, in integrity there, I think it’s really powerful.
Lunden Souza: [00:29:51] So feel free to send me a DM. Mostly on Instagram is where you’ll probably get me the quickest at life like London and just send me a DM there and just be like, Hey, this is my word of the year. I listen to this episode, here’s how I want to show up. Here are some of my subcategories or ways. All I know I’ll be showing up as my core values as my word of the year. The more detailed you get, the better. I feel like putting that down on paper and just really saying who you want to be and what that looks like. And then going in and being that, Yeah, I feel like that’s really like living life fully. So send me a DM, share your words of the year with me. Thank you for listening and love you. Bye. Thank you so much for listening to this episode of Self Love and Sweat the podcast. Hey, do me a favor, wherever you’re listening to this podcast. Give us a review. This really helps a lot and share this with a friend. I’m only one person and with your help we can really spread the message of self love and sweat and change more lives all around the world. I’m London Souza, reminding you that you deserve a life full of passion, presence and purpose fueled by self love and sweat. This podcast is a hit spot. Austria production.